The dreaded two week wait...still haven't heard anything from the agency about the couple and if they did get pregnant. I almost feel like I am waiting to find out if I am pregnant... I know it's silly, but in a way, our lives kind of running parallel to each other, at least until the results are announced--then I feel like I can keep on truckin' along to my next cycle.

I was reading Michelle's blog about infertility and egg donors. I am flattered that you think my blog should be a mandatory read for ladies thinking about donating. To be honest, when I first decided to start this journey, I tried to do the research. I scoured the internet. If I was lucky, I would get a few mentions about DEs in IP's blogs. But that was it. I found two blogs from two retired donors that were informative, but I didn't feel like it gave enough information. I really debated on putting my blog out there at first. In the end, I came to the conclusion that there is not nothing here that I will ever be embarrassed about. I have had friends that have let the fact that I am donor slip and each and every time, I have been open and honest about it with friends. I know it's hard to admit to others that you are a donor, it's a controversial subject after all, but I would say that 100% of my friends have been supportive, those that don't know, I choose to believe they would also be supportive. So, I am surprised (but in a good way)that people seem to be reading and suggesting my blogs to others. I hope you can all take away something from this and I know one day, years from now, I will visit this blog again and see the things that I did when I was younger and feel rewarded -- cheesy, right?

As for me being a "serial donor"...well, there is some truth in that, I suppose. I am a multiple time donor. Yes. I do take it seriously, i.e. no caffeine, no alcohol, eating healthy, taking prenatal vitamins/multivitamins. Check. I feel it's only fair to the IPs...they are paying for hope (as clique as that may be) and hope comes with a bit of sacrifice. Am I glad when I get my body back after a cycle? HELL YEAH I am. But realistically, I rather know that the IPs eggs in my basket did not go to waste. Maybe I just am hard on myself because I don't want to hurt them. Though I know nothing about besides their first name...which could be an alias, I feel like they are a part of my life...no matter how small. I would like to believe that I a slight part of theirs. We each travel our own paths until we meet at the fork in the road and for a time, we manage to walk side by side. Idealist? Yes, I am. Perfectionist? Can't you tell by now ;)? Do I get paid well for what I do? Yes. Is being a donor a cake walk? Cake? Where? (Honestly, no. I can live without the pain, the swelling, the brusing, the exhaustion.)

Anyways, as I also wait to find out the good news about Couple C (C as in 3rd donation), I am optimistic about the next one for Couple D. I have not gone on bcp...it messes with me too much, I am taking vitamins and baby aspirin to get ready for the next one. Someday...after all is said and done, I will be me again. With eggs just for me. No more hormones, no more pills, no shots, no blood draws, no doctors, no bruises or swelling. When that day comes, I know I will miss being able to help, being able to walk beside someone struggling down the road of infertility. But I will be happy to be the only person relying on me. Selfish? Maybe. For the people that have never experienced infertility, or have ever donated, keep an open mind. It isn't easy to give up your life for someone else, even if it's just a few months. It is not easy to shoot yourself up with hormones that you don't know which no one can tell you with certainty if it will effect you later on. It isn't easy to hardly be able to pee because of the retrieval. We, the donors, chose to help beyond the compensation, you have to, because money is just money. The amount of things I have had to endure from the donations is more than money can buy. Would I do this without compensation? Yes, but it would have to be for someone that really needed it.

I could be anyone. I could be your sister. Your mother. Your friend. I am also a Serial Donor, does that sound negative? Well, I guess I will just have to claim that phrase and make it positive. Maybe a "serial donor" can be someone that really believes in what they are doing. Someone that does everything in her power to make sure the IPs have the best chance they can get. Yeah...I am a serial donor :D

Summer--Yup, it seems to be a normal thing. In the pass donations, I have also bruised. Have I bruised or swelled to this extent? I can't remember, honestly. I am thinking the answer would be yes. Not to worry, I am going to doctor's appointments everyday so far, no one has said anything about it being a bad thing. It's just not exactly an "attractive" thing ;). But you win some and you lose some. No big deal. I sent that picture to my boyfriend and he was very surprised. I told him he gets to hang around that bloated bruised mess this weekend....let's just say he was very --- excited.


Katy-- Feel free to link me, I have this blog to help others through the donation process as well as those that are on the receiving end. And if anyone else out there has linked me to their page, please let me know, I will link you on my page. Granted, my perspective may be different than yours but I do hope that whatever you take away from this blog is useful :) Nice to meet you and thanks for the comment.


I spent last night visiting donor egg chat boards. Some for the donors and some for the IPs. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to use one of the boards because it hates all of my email addresses. I guess you have to have an AOL account to post. It's a conspiracy because I just wanted to reply to a girl's questions about being a first time donor. If anyone knows of any other boards that I can participate in, let me know.

Looks like the retrieval might be towards the end of the week. I can't wait to lose the bloat and the overall feeling of fullness. I DO NOT look forward to the period that is sure to fall---it's always like a massacre (TMI, I know, but very true). I spent most of today shopping for retrieval-day pants. Yes, pants made for the day of. For those that have never gone though a donation, if you take away three points from this blog, it is this:

1. Once you decide you are going to donation, go off the pill for awhile, like I previously posted, the longer I am off the pill prior to getting back on to synchronize with the IP, the better my response. (DISCLAIMER: this is mainly for me, you may be different, you know your body best).

2. On the day of the retrieval and the next day, you want pants that give and stretch. You always want them to be as soft and comfortable as possible. Your stomach/abdomen will swell upon retrieval and usually, you will not be able to fit into your normal pants right away. I spent all day today, looking for such a pair of pants...FYI, Victoria's Secret lounge pants are the best!

3. ALWAYS, and I do mean, ALWAYS, take the pain killers. No matter what you think, the first 48 hours is painful when the painkillers wear off. Don't end up like me, crying on the stairs while out with friends (see March 2007).

I have spent all day shopping for pants and ended up buying some jeans and other stuff while I was out. I've lost almost 20lbs in the last few months so it was about time...the "poopy diaper" look is not in, no matter what anyone tells you. Surprising enough, I was able to get into the jeans even with the swelling.

I am very very tempted to buy an expensive pair of sunglasses as a present to myself for the donation. But I have yet to break down and do it. It's just alot of money. But I am still considering it, after all, it's alot of pain to go through and overall discomfort, I feel like I should get something nice for myself. Which brings me to this: for those IPs that write letters to your donor, I think that is the sweetest thing ever. In the past two completed donations I have participated in, I have never received said letter--not that I expect it. However, I have heard of people doing it and I think it's wonderful. I do wonder about the IPs and the possible children that resulted. It would have been nice to have that touch of warmth in what could really be a very cold and sterile procedure and process. In a way, it makes it worthwhile. For those of us that don't get the letter, its not like we hold a grudge, its just that we never truly feel your side...you know what I mean? I have said before that I do this to help them and to help myself, I am not delusional about that. However, it's just nice to know that you are more than a follie count to someone else.


Well, that is it for now. Talk to you all tomorrow.